Marc Savard is the King of One Liners, part two!

Marc Savard: What about you?
What do you do, Geneva? -I just graduated from college. Marc Savard: Where did you graduate from? -Carrington College as an MA. Marc Savard: MMA fighter! Oh, that’s fantas… -No, no.
Marc Savard: Oh no, no. I’m sorry what? -A medical assistant. Marc Savard: Oh I see, I see.
I thought you said MMA. -No, no, no, no. Marc Savard: Alright, okay
because that would be pretty badass. -I could fight though. Marc Savard: You could fight, I bet you.
I bet you got a real good rear naked joke.
It’s an MMA move. Excellent. Good to have you here. -I’m a cook. Marc Savard: You’re a cook like meth or like food? -However. Marc Savard: However. You’re doing both.
Alright, good. That’s good, that’s fantastic. How are you? What do you do? -I’m a manager in Tesco’s in the UK. Marc Savard: Okay, in the UK. Where in the UK? -At Wales. Marc Savard: Wales! Good.
How are they doing over there?
I keep sending money to save them. -I don’t know. -Chef. Marc Savard: A chef! Excellent!
And where are you from? -Illinois. Marc Savard: Nice to have you here. Good.
Enjoying Vegas? Having a good time here? It’s alright. It’s alright. Where are you staying?
Where are you staying? Where are you at? -I live here. Marc Savard: Oh! You live in…
Oh I see, I see, I see. Okay, good. You’re cooking somewhere here or..? -Yeah. Marc Savard: Like a line chef, a sous chef,
or what do you do? -No, oyster bar chef. Marc Savard: Oyster bar. Excellent, alright.
Oh, yeah oysters. – Come down, we have great oysters. Marc Savard: You have oysters
so your hands always smell like fish. -Yeah. Marc Savard: Yeah. -Yeah. Yeah, I know. Marc Savard: No, it is what it is. Yeah, yeah. Marc Savard: Alright.
Scoot over a little tad to your left there, guys,
a little tad a bit. Excellent, good. Now be careful when you’re wearing
a flannel shirt like that.
It looks like lumberjacking. Alright. You’ve got your cell phone on you,
turn it to the off position.
That way, it’s not going to bother anyone up here. Or at least turn it to the pleasure mode.
That would be sufficient. Wait a minute. What the hell is that? It is a chip clip that makes phone calls.
That is unbelievable. It’s time to upgrade, buddy.
It’s time to upgrade. I thought that was only in museums.
Alright. He’s got an artifact in his pocket. Alright, what about you, what do you do? -I make arms and legs. I’m an orthodist. Marc Savard: Excellent!
So you’re kind of an arms dealer. -Kind of, yeah.
Marc Savard: Yeah! Awesome, awesome. You sir, I’m going to swap you up
with the gentleman with all the muscles. You work out or you buy your shirts
at Baby Gap or both? You go both? Alright, excellent.
I’m just messing with you there. Don’t hurt me. Your name sir. -Mason. Marc Savard: Mason! Good to have you here.
Mason’s friends, make some noise. Okay good. Can I borrow your belt?
Can I borrow your belt if you don’t mind? You’re not going to lose your pants, are you?
Then you’ll be a freemason. How about you, what do you do? -I’m a petroleum supplier specialist
to the United States Army. Marc Savard: Oh excellent! That’s good, good. So you have a lot of gas?
-I do. Marc Savard: Yeah, excellent! That’s right. What about you, Jonathan, what do you do? -I’m a warehouse worker. Marc Savard: Warehouse worker. Alright.
What’s your position there because I guess
the ultimate job would be head receiver. -Yeah. Marc Savard: Right? -I don’t want to… I don’t want to… Marc Savard: Yeah, yes.
That’s what everyone’s working to be. Alright.
It’s the best job there. Where are you from? -I’m from Las Vegas. Marc Savard: Oh, local!
Good to have you here. Excellent, good. What about you, what do you do? -I’m an attorney. Marc Savard: An attorney.
Maybe just take one step back
from the front edge of the stage. I’m just kidding. That was an attorney’s joke.
Alright, where are you from? -Dallas. Marc Savard: Dallas! Good to have you here. How about you, what do you do? -I do background investigations. Marc Savard: Background investigations.
Alright, this conversation is over. I’m just kidding. I’m just kidding.
What kind of investigations you check
like criminal stuff? -For security clearances. Marc Savard: Security clearances.
You got to like check the computers and stuff? -Yeah.
Marc Savard: Yeah. Okay. Well if you check mine, I was looking up
grandfather clock and I just forgot the L. It was an honest mistake. So what do you do in the Army? -Kill people. Marc Savard: No, I understand.
What did you say? -Rifles
In the Army, Rifles Marc Savard: Yeah, I get it but…
-Infantry. Marc Savard: Oh, infantry.
-Yeah. Marc Savard: Oh, I love kids. It’s great. How about you, what’s your name? -Melody. Marc Savard: Melody!
That has a nice ring to it. We trimmed up the stage a little bit
so it wasn’t as much as of a sausage fest which means a lot of guys.
I had to explain that. My mom’s here tonight. She might think it’s the new
senior breakfast at Danny’s. That’s not the case. It’s not that. Looked like you were dancing. -I don’t dance. Marc Savard: You don’t? -I’m white.
Marc Savard: What? -I’m white.
Marc Savard: Right. You’re saying you don’t dance
but it looked like you were dancing.
I mean you’re… -I’m out of breath. Marc Savard: You’re out of breath
so I was wondering maybe… -I wasn’t dancing.
Marc Savard: Okay. But you’re not sure why you’re out of breath.
Do your legs feel a little bit Jello-y? -A little bit.
Marc Savard: Yeah. Well, it’s a little unusual
wouldn’t you think, Clay? What about your feet? Your feet sore? -It was the stairs. Marc Savard: Your feet sore? -They’re very sore.
Marc Savard: Very sore. Aching?
-Aching. Marc Savard: Yeah, so Clay achin’?
It was a far cry to get that joke there. Eric, what do you do? What do you do? -I go to school. Marc Savard: What are you taking? -Earth and Planetary Science.
Marc Savard: Earth and Planetary Sciences. Growing weed, alright!
Right, right. Excellent, good! And you sir, what do you do? -I’m a firefighter. Marc Savard: A firefighter, excellent! Good. So when you were growing up,
your parents were probably trying to keep you
off the pole and they just couldn’t do it. You were on the pole. Yeah! I’m just kidding.
I’m just kidding. I’m just kidding. You played with your hose all day long. -All day! Thanks for watching.
I hope you enjoyed the video. Now if you’re thinking about subscribing to my channel, You could do that by clicking here. If you’re thinking about watching last week’s video, You could do that by clicking here. -I don’t live anywhere. Marc Savard: You’re transient? Thanks, and we’ll see you soon!

19 thoughts on “Marc Savard is the King of One Liners, part two!

  1. Why do you ask where their friends are in the audience? There has to be something to that (is it to get an economical-demographic on them based on how much they spent on tickets?)

    And can you please explain the attorney joke when you tell them to step back from the edge. Heard you say that a few times and it keeps eluding me. Now I'm cyberly hypnotizing you to answer this comment in 4,3,2,1……………….

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